In the thick of it

2 auditions Thursday, 2 auditions yesterday. Now I have the weekend off, and start up again in Chicago on Monday.

Though it is overwhelming to rattle off all my auditions when someone asks about my schedule, it is much easier to do them when it's all happening in real time.

But I will say this: being at NOLA (the audition studios in NYC) during these weeks has to be the most stressful thing I've witnessed in a while. Or at least, it should be. 100 people crowded into a tiny hallway, 3 different companies holding auditions on the same floor, everyone either making or avoiding idle chit-chat with everyone else....and I kind of like it. I feel comfortable enough in how I'm sounding and performing to think that a company will (eventually) notice and hire me. Yes, the sheer numbers are against everyone who is trying to make a go of this career. I finally feel like I have something worth sharing in the performances I give, and that's what these auditions are...mini, super-important, judged performances.

Now I'm off to Long Island to hang out with Megan, my maid of honor...getting AWAY from the giant nervous crowd of 20-something singers sounds pretty awesome right now.

Gearing Up

I've just spent a week at home, resting and seeing family. My mother and father threw a great engagement party for Jon and I, so he could meet all the relatives and friends. He did VERY well...he's all used to talking to crowds, with the singing and everything.

Next up, I have 10 auditions in as many days. I am a little frazzled, mostly by the thought of going through 5 cities for all of them! Singing isn't that stressful to me, but travel sure as hell is.

I am excited to share my voice with all the companies, and hopefully something awesome will come of it. Wish me luck!

I'm Backstage!

At my Puccini gala concert with the Verismo Opera Club of Chicago. I've finished my portion of this evening's program. And...it was FUN. One hopes that, having to put so much time and energy into getting onstage, that it would be fun once you're actually ON it. But it isn't, always. Sometimes it's nerve racking, if you haven't prepared adequately. Getting something "performance ready" generally takes a lot of time and energy for me..if I haven't put in the time, I tend to overthink what I'm doing, and that is when I'm most likely to screw up.

I will say that I spent a bit less time on the repertoire I sang tonight than I normally do...and yet everything went quite well. It leads me to believe that I am sabotaging myself when I doubt that I can, in fact, do my job. I just did it, it was fun, and I get to do it again on Sunday.

Birthday!

I am no longer even in the shade of "early 20's"

a hard-and-fast age of 25 means there are no more excuses. When I was about 18 I decided, after hanging out with an older crowd, that I was going to do every stupid thing there was to do until I was 25, and then that would be IT and there would be NO MORE SCREWING UP ALLOWED.

Then this morning I left a pancake in the pan for 10 minutes....thanks smoke detector! 5 minutes later, I blew a fuse while trying to blowdry my hair. WIN.

There is a certain confidence I'm gaining in my career, though. I am now officially at the age where Things Can Happen...big comp wins, young artist programs, etc. I have no more excuses of "oh I'm a baby, it's fine." The normal uncertainty of career is there, but hopefully this "wisdom" I'm gaining through all of my past stage experiences will calm me down a bit and make this audition season one of smooth sailing.

And now, to go fill out some forms where I have to check the "25-40" year old box instead of "18-24."...I'm sorry, WHO made that call? Maybe this means all the angst of adolescence will just melt away.....fingers crossed. Off to rehearsal!

It's about time somebody wrote something in this thing.

When I set out to start this blog, I wanted to fill it with all the excitement and mishegos of singing. I think I have done a pretty good job of that. One of my rules is that I try to keep entries pretty positive while still being true to my life.

And now we come to the center of the maze of a young opera singer's career: Audition Season. Audition season is a very trying time in which you can send out applications for several dozen young artist and summer programs throughout the country (or, if you're super ambitious, the world) and then you wait to see if you've been granted an audition. Never mind being given a contract....sometimes companies give you the breakdown of apps received, auditions granted, and contracts offered, and the numbers are Staggering. You just take it one step at a time and hope for them to hear you...cuz you can't get hired if you don't audition.

Knowing all of this, I bravely forged ahead and sent out my 2 dozen or so apps...and I have to say, the return has been pretty good. Perhaps 2 out of 3 times, I've been granted an audition. Yay! Even with those high numbers though, it's difficult to deal with rejections. We all go through it, and are told over and over again to "develop a thick skin." The competition for opera nowadays is comparable with that of Broadway...opera is super cool, and everyone wants to do it (less people want to SEE it, but that's another post...) so I've developed some coping mechanisms ("I am not my voice...there is more to me than my voice...even though it's what I've been working on since I was 4 years old and I feel like I'm baring my soul every time I open my mouth"...ok maybe that one won't work so well) and am so grateful every time I get an opportunity to share my voice with another person.

So...5 auditions behind me, 12 or so ahead. Time to forge on! With a WONDERFUL thanksgiving beforehand.

Long Time Without a Post...again...

This month was NOT so boring that I didn't have anything to post about.
It was so busy that I didn't have time..plus STILL no internet (RCN is about to get the strongest worded letter I've ever written...). But it doesn't matter, since I will be in Cincinnati with Jon in just 3 weeks! I landed a job and therefore am able to move earlier than expected.

Here's a recap on this awesome month:

-2 weeks with Opera for the Young, performing Pirates of Penzance. Which is really an amazing company to work for and with. The first week of October, I was in rehearsal with them, and I just now came off of a week long tour throughout Wisconsin and Illinois. There were some GEMS of questions that kids came up with; some were about details of the show ("why is February such a beastly month?") and some were just plain cute (Kindergartener raises hand and, when called on, proudly proclaims "I likeded the show"). I will be touring with them throughout the winter and spring as well, and am thrilled with how fun it is. It reaffirms my career choice on a daily basis.

-World premier performance of Kyong-Me Choi's "The Eternal Tao." This Guggenheim funded production was performed last Friday, October 22, and was the most difficult piece of music I've ever had to sing on stage. Dr. Choi employed extended techniques such as sprechstimme and hummed chromatic scales, and had orchestra, electronics, recorded sounds, and singers. Somehow it all came together and we had a fantastic performance. I definitely had to push my ears and rhythm to the limit in order to prepare for this piece, and it's nice to know I have that capacity.

-I also had a couple of auditions/competitions...and many more to follow. This is always the hardest time of year for me...learning to separate Myself as a person from what I do. It's a recurring theme here, but it is difficult to have such a personal aspect of yourself judged on a regular basis, and yet maintain high esteem and what I heard referred to as "courage" this past week. I never thought of audition season as a courageous time, and I think that will help my process this season. At any rate, I'm proud of what I've accomplished this past year. Hopefully my momentum will continue.

Now, to bed. I have a consultation/lesson tomorrow with the man who I hope will be my new voice teacher once I move to Cincy for good.

Ok, not having internet is getting ridiculous....

I spoke to another friendly yet ultimately unhelpful RCN technical assistant yesterday. GAH.

Last week I was up in Madison, rehearsing for and launching Opera For The Young's 2010-2011 tour of Pirates of Penzance! It was a FANTASTIC week. All the singers are great and the staff are some of the kindest, most fun people I've ever met. I tried to blog from my hotel room there but kept getting caught up in rehearsing/socializing/sleeping.

I will tour Madison and come down to the burbs of Chicago during the last week of October. Check my website for locations of my public performances!