Lee Hoiby

Today the Classical Music world lost a great man. Lee Hoiby, pianist and composer, aged 85, died after a short illness. His output was prolific and his fans are many. I personally have performed several of his works since I began studying seriously in 2003. One of his arias, from A Month in the Country, has been on my aria list for several years now. I performed another work of his, "Night Songs," on my Senior Recital at Purchase. I first heard those songs at a summer program in 2004, and I was blown away. His text painting and melodic line was brilliant. I had always thought that contemporary composers operated exclusively under the guise of "weird notes for the sake of weird notes" But here was someone who understood the connection between the singer and audience using melodic line. I ordered the music for them the next day, and was so excited to perform them a few years later.

It makes me especially sad to see Mr. Hoiby go because so many people in this world never even knew he existed. For those of us in the music field, it is a huge loss and I know myself and many of my colleagues are mourning him this evening. However, when I mention his name to someone not in the field, they have no idea who he was. It is a reminder that the field of Classical Music is literally dying out, and we must work to make sure that these composers are heard. I am an advocate of New music, because it is only through performing new works that composition remains an innovative, thriving form of creativity.

R.I.P. Mr. Hoiby.

Palm Beach

...is where I'm stationed for the next 2 weeks. I WISH I were singing here, but alas I am just nannying. Can't complain though. The weather is amazing, we get to go to the frou-frou club every day, and I don't have to think about singing until April 2. I miss it terribly though. I optimistically brought a couple of pieces to work on for a competition I will potentially enter next month. They are still in my suitcase. 3 kids keep me busy! And tired. Night.

"Winning"

No, not the Charlie Sheen kind.

I was offered a role in a show today. A local, community show. No big deal. just something to do. Yet, it felt almost as good as landing any of the bigger gigs (relatively speaking) that I've landed. That high of "somebody thinks I'm good at what I want to do!" feels SO freaking amazing. I wish I could bottle that feeling.

But I can't. I've tried so hard to think of something that gives me the high of landing a job. There's something about winning. Gaining something for yourself using your god-given and ridiculously-trained talent. I'll keep searching though.

Artistic Satisfaction

One thing that singers are constantly asked in a conservatory setting is "why are you doing this? If you can think of anything in the world you'd rather be doing, go do that."

Every time that question/follow up statement was voiced, I responded confidently "I love singing! I love it here!"...but "here" at the time meant school.
I LOVED being in school for music. It had everything...research opportunities for your classes, recitaling, big roles in operas, and constant connection with colleagues.

Then school ended, and we were flung out into the real world. And the real world is HARD. I don't know why this should have been news to any of us, but it was. And many of the people I went to graduate school with are not performing on giant operatic stages at the moment. Myself included.

Which leaves me to wonder: what did I get my MM for? If the result of a conservatory degree is supposed to lead to a career in music, why are so many of us not there?
You might say "ah, but you're not there YET. You have to pay your dues, keep struggling, SUFFER FOR YOUR ART."
I've never been good at suffering. I LOVE my art. If I'm not doing something creative just about every minute of the day, I go to pieces. But "creative" doesn't always mean "singing." This morning I painted flower pots. I am in the middle of crocheting 2 blankets. And I've always enjoyed writing.
I've decided while I'm waiting and suffering and paying my dues, I'd like to see if one of my other creative passions can thrive as much as I hope my music will. I'm currently considering a dual career in music and writing/PR. ..I'd love a dual career in crochet and music, but the chances of making it at THOSE two are slim to nil.
I'm not looking at this decision as "giving up" on anything. I'm just looking for ways to continue satisfying myself as an artist.

One month later, here we are

Sorry it's been so long since I've blogged! I've been LIVING the singing life instead of writing about it.

I'm just finishing up 3 weeks in a row of tour with Opera for the Young. It's been quite an experience living on the road, out of a suitcase, for almost a month. The shows have been fun. I enjoy interacting with my fellow castmates every day, and hopefully changing a few kid's lives while doing so.

I will write more soon...been thinking a lot about the career, where I'm heading in life at the moment, and the general quarterlife crisis that seems to be hitting everyone my age right about now.

Work in Progress

This is my mantra for the year.

I've decided to try and take a bit of time off from auditions, because I feel as though I haven't reached my full vocal potential, and won't until I've spent more time with my new teacher and in the practice room. I hate going into auditions feeling as though the product I'm selling is incomplete. Since Young Artist Programs are supposed to DEVELOP you, there's a balance that should be struck between showing you are a good singer, but also showing that you have potential to be developed. I feel like my balance is slightly off-kilter...I want to have a better "first version" to show companies, and the only way to do that is to take a step back from auditions.

This is a scary prospect, because if I'm not actively singing for new people all the time, I feel as though I'm not taking steps to further my career. I know that this isn't true, and I have to develop patience, which I've never had. I picked a hell of a career for someone who doesn't like to wait.

First Week is done!

I made it through the first week of OFY tour in good voice and in good company. Our cast was really great...not a weak link in the bunch, everyone relaxed and happy, and ready to teach a few thousand kids about opera. I was a little sad to leave, but am looking forward to a short break back in Cincy before my next tour leg.

Before returning to Cincy, though, I've made a stop in Chicago to see Jon in Gianni Schicchi with the Dupage Opera Theater. It was a wonderful show! Almost everyone involved has been/is about to be a Ryan Center Artist with the Lyric Opera of Chicago. The talent level was exceptional, but more than that, everyone seemed to be having such a great time up there, and the good times continued afterwards when we went out to celebrate closing night.

It was great to meet and talk with these singers...about outreach, about finding jobs, and about how life goes on whether or not you're singing at the Met. I know I've said it before on here, but I love being a part of this family of people who have chosen the same path I have. It's very enlightening to speak with people who are a bit ahead of me on the path...I always leave these conversations reassured and glad to see how genuinely nice most singers are.

Now it's back to CIncy...after tying up a few loose ends at my old apartment, whose lease ends Monday. Then I'll REALLY be done with Chicago, for now :-( it's been fun!